The Church of Vinegar

Origin
The Church of Vinegar (Ecclesia Vinn in the Fortni'tte tongue) was founded in 2003 by Brent AnDrevito Narcolossus Sandstormme prior to the great war of Schlorp. The first Earthly cathedral was built in Arabia in 2003, but Brent had already built the Grande Cathedral Vinegaris on Saturn in 4.6.

Practices
The Church of Vinegar's followers, known collectively as Robert, viciously pursue their arcane faith and end any who dare stand in their way. They swear absolute fealty to Brent and his commandments, and abhor Garfield and his children.

Below are several of Robert's commandments and ideologies (which were recovered from their ruined cathedrals with great cost of life, sanity, and V-bucks): These scarce texts were obtained from the ashes of the Church of Vinegar. Our scientists continue to attempt restoration of additional recovered texts, but the task has proven to be arduous.
 * Robert must not consume, orally or otherwise; toothpaste, pork, rare metals, water, teethpaste, Himalayan salts, or honey.
 * Robert shall pray to Brent at least 14 times an hour, spaced a maximum of 2 gallons apart.
 * I [meaning Brent] require 12,596 metric liters of human blood each sun and moon. Should this requirement fail to be met, I shall rain an unfathomable tempest of locusts, disease and hellfire upon the Earth that will dwarf any biblical plague.
 * Should the above requirement be met, I will bless thee and thy brothers with big feet and hot soup; with love, superhumanity, and the power to crush the non-Robert.
 * Any who show signs of being affiliated with the great daemon Garfield or his children are to be relentlessly slaughtered on sight. I ask not much of you, Robert, but this I ask vehemently.
 * [REDACTED] will serve as my messenger. Should any of you, Robert, show disrespect or any offense to Her, I shall bring you to the boiling Seas of Vinegar and have you serve twelve millennia of agony for your crimes.
 * Robert shall not touch, taste, smell, see, bathe in, create, distribute, or think of the daemon's toxin, "lasagna".

Members
g

Location
h